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Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Cop Rock S1E2: Ill-Gotten Gaines

Starring:
Anne Bobby as Off. Vicki Quinn
Barbara Bosson as Mayor Louise Plank
Vondie Curtis-Hall as Det. Warren Osborne
Ronny Cox as Chief Roger Kendrick
David Gianopoulos as Off. Andy Campo
Larry Joshua as Capt. John Hollander
James McDaniel as Off. Franklin Rose
Ron McLarty as Ralph Ruskin
Mick Murray as Det. Joseph Gaines
Peter Onorati as Det. Vincent LaRusso
Sidney Weitz as Dennis Lipscomb

Written by: William M. Finkelstein and Stephen Bochco and John Romano
Directed by: Gregory Hoblit

The first episode seemed to want to cram too many things in at once, with absolutely no “easing in” for the viewer; thankfully, here we have a chance to gather our senses.  Unfortunately, the plot that seems to be standing out in the spotlight is the most frustrating of the bunch: Capt. Hollander’s attempt to get to the bottom of what really happened to drug dealer, and known cop-killer, Tyrone Powers.

Powers, you will recall, was the cop-killing drug pusher from the first episode, who was killed by Officer LaRusso after he learned Tyrone was being detained without a warrant.  Rather than risk letting him go a second time (it was after he was released due to prison overcrowding the first time, that he ended up shooting a cop), he simply shot him dead, then made sure it looked like a shooting in self-defense.  And that’s how it looked to anyone who might have wandered into the crime scene, as LaRusso planted a machine gun on Powers’ body to make it look like he might have opened fire first.

It’s a little ridiculous that Captain Hollander would have even been able to tell just from looking at things that it was a homicide, rather than self-defense, and even stupider that he would keep pursuing it even after Internal Affairs ruled that LaRusso was correct in his actions.  If this were just a juvenile on a marijuana charge, I could understand his vendetta against LaRusso; but a cop-killer?  Come on…anyone in that department would just be happy he’s dead.  It’s just an ignorant storyline to have, and one that rings hollow, especially since police have long covered-up the “accidental” murders of people who have done far less.

“Ill-Gotten Gaines” starts off with the funeral service for Officer Braden, who was the cop killed by Powers.  Of course, his partner, Officer Rose, has to deliver a eulogy, and of course that eulogy has to come in the form of a song.  The shot of a saxophonist delivering the first few notes of the song is just another in a long-line of legendarily awful scenes; despite this false start, I have to admit that the song actually has a certifiable melody and some decent lyrics, automatically making it one of the better ones we’ve seen thus far (and by far the best one in this episode).

Meanwhile, Frank is returned to active duty patrolling the streets, and is given an awkward white cop as a partner who likes to sing Motown while they’re cruising the streets.  This upsets Frank, who simply wants to ride in peace, and he begs Hollander to find him a new partner.  Hollander refuses, though watching the way the rookie calmly and efficiently diffuses a potentially-dangerous situation wins him over, just as we knew something would.  There’s also a minor subplot involving a break-in at a rich house, but I’m thinking the only reason that’s thrown in there is so the show can provide us with two additional song-and-dance numbers: the first features Vicki and her partner Andy singing about how great it would be to be rich together, while the second is a cringe-inducing number featuring a gang of Cubans standing in a police lineup; it’s by far the worst of a bad bunch.

We’re only two episodes in, and the urge to throw in the towel is becoming more and more tempting with each passing minute spent watching this.  There are still nine episodes left.  At the current rate, that’s 36 mostly-intolerable musical sequences, and at least 9 more inane subplots that we’re going to have to slog through.  What’s amazing is that this show somehow still attempts to deal with real issues--there’s a sequence where a black cop is referred to as a “monkey” (though the derogatory term comes from another black man, which I guess lessens the impact some) that caught me completely off guard, but there’s just no room for a movie with dancing policemen to make any kind of serious statement whatsoever, and that‘s its biggest problem.  It’s nothing short of a complete failure overall, though at its best, which is incredibly rare, it at least manages to be a slightly interesting one.

EPISODE RATING: 3/10

FULL EPISODE


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