Writer(s): Brian Marchetti, Jack Marchetti, and Jamie R. Thompson
Starring: Elisabeth Harnois, Jonathan Togo, Chad Michael Collins, and Sasha Jackson
Well shit, isn't that a goddamned stupid title? What the hell does it even mean? Now that I've sat down and watched the entire movie, I can tell you that...I still have no idea. Especially considering the alternate title is the much more sensical A Christmas Cupid—why not just stick to that one?
Anyway, assuming you can get past the horrible first ten minutes, and then get past the horribly half-baked plot, this one is actually fairly enjoyable. Resident Christmas movie actress, and former child star Elisabeth Harnois is once again the lead here, playing a college professor named Holly (how original!) who is looking for love. So, of course, her friend signs her up for an online dating service, where she meets a good-looking man who also happens to be a complete moron. Lacking the words necessary to appeal to the scholarly woman (and also ignoring the fact that, even aside from that, they have no chemistry together whatsoever), he enlists the help of his ol' college buddy David—who's a writer with a dead wife and young child—to help him find the words that will help him get in her pants.
But the “twist” here is that David is falling for Holly himself, being paired up with her to help design the company's winter formal dance...and he has no idea that Holly is the woman he's writing love poems to on behalf of his douchy friend! Wow these plots just keep getting worse and worse...
Anyway, this one is a "winner" (in the loosest sense of the term) thanks to the cast, who are all uniformly solid in career-destroying roles. Sasha Jackson is adorably hilarious as Holly's right-hand woman, Emily, delivering perfectly-timed zingers and elevating her character to a level that few holiday supporting actresses can match. Seriously, she's damn near brilliant, and singlehandedly makes this movie way more enjoyable than it should be in every scene she's in.
Jonathan Togo is likable as “the man behind the words”...although he does sometimes go a little bit overboard in later scenes, delivering his lines with an intensity more fit for a real movie, rather than one of these half-baked holiday turds. Ms. Harnois, being a seasoned vet, seems to have this whole Christmas movie acting thing down pat, and proves to be a reliable leading lady.
As the saying goes, you can't polish a turd, and Christmas Cupid's Arrow is still one of those thanks to its ignorant title, and equally stupid plot, that would have been an utter disaster with a different cast. But these are people you wouldn't mind spending a little bit of time with—and 90 minutes is the perfect length to ensure that, unlike your family, they don't stick around and completely overstay their welcome.
STRAY OBSERVATION
- I must say this has one of the more believable “this guy that I think is great is actually a complete douchebag and I should probably break up with him” reveals of any generic holiday movie I've ever seen.
TRAILER
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