Glass (Roblox)

 

When it comes to gaming in general, I veer more toward horror games. Why not? It’s my favorite genre. But I’m also open to playing any game that I feel is different enough to warrant some attention. (Okay, who am I kidding? I’ve played my fair share of “simulator” games, some thanks to my child…and some not.) 

“Glass” is a game unlike any other I’ve seen on the platform. It seems to get its name from the way the enemies "shatter" when struck with bullets. From what I can tell, it’s basically a side-scrolling version of “Superhot” that brings the same main mechanics. You can walk, run, jump, slide and - most usefully - slow down time. But don’t let its appearance fool you: “Glass” also functions as a puzzle game. The way the bad guys are aligned at the beginning of each level often hints at a simple solution. This isn’t a run-and-gun style action game where you just blow everything to bits. Instead, it’s a thinking man’s shooter.

The introductory tutorial makes things seem easy.

The slow motion mechanics help to not only make things look cool, but give you a fighting chance. Especially in later levels, where the number of enemies increase, with some appearing out of nowhere from behind. 

The game is nearly flawless from an idea standpoint. Unfortunately, it has one major problem: the controls. The keyboard scheme itself is fine - I have no complaints. Mouse aims, shift runs, right click slides, left slick shoots, and space bar jumps; all pretty standard stuff. The letter keys (W, A, S and D) control the character. I prefer arrows, but given the limited 2-D range of movement, it’s easy enough. I’m terrible at aiming on the move, but it’s doable.

My issue is the responsiveness of said controls. I don’t know if it’s just limited to me, or if it’s a known issue (believable since it hasn’t been updated since 2019), but inevitably the controls just stop working as they should. This has happened every single time I’ve played. Sometimes it’s on the first couple levels, occasionally a little later. But it always happens.

This is as much a puzzle game as it is a shooter.

What’s frustrating is that it’s always the most important ones. The slow motion and sprint keys always work, as does player movement. It’s the fire and slide keys that are rendered useless at any given time. And what’s worse is that I can’t find a rhyme or reason as to when, or why, or how to fix it. Sometimes I’ll right click, and my character will fire his weapon. Or I’ll hit the fire button, and nothing happens at all. Generally, if I stand still and press fire repeatedly, it will eventually respond. The problem is, by then I’m generally dead.

I don’t understand it. Maybe the issue is with my computer. I use a laptop, so maybe the game has trouble differentiating between left and right clicks? If so, this would be odd, as it doesn’t happen in any other game I’ve played, Roblox or otherwise. It also isn’t an issue outside of gaming, which is what makes it all the more confusing.

So here’s my quandary: “Glass” is a one-of-a-kind Roblox game with massive control issues. How can I recommend that? I don’t know, but I am. It’s just too unique of an “experience” to pass up. When the controls work, it’s a wholly satisfying action game that’s one of the best on the platform. The shootouts - while brief - are exciting, and can lead to some truly epic escapes.

The action scenes are satisfying when the controls work...

But when they don’t - an all too common occurrence - the game becomes little more than a “suicide simulator”. And who knew watching your defenseless character die repeatedly isn’t nearly as fun as being the one causing all the havoc?

...and this is a familiar scene when they don't.

This is a potentially underrated gem that is ripe for a remake (or update).

Overall: 6/10.

Crowd Evolution (Android)

WHAT IS IT?

“Crowd Evolution” is a highly-advertised “action” game where you defeat enemies while going through “windows” that either weaken or strengthen your group by carrying them backwards or forwards through time.

At least, that’s the best explanation you’re going to get within the confines of a single sentence.

UI

I’ve bemoaned many mobile games for having a confusing user interface. They seem to want to pack in as many different game modes and features as possible, that the experience of merely navigating around can be somewhat exhausting. 

The main screen, showing all you this game has to "offer".

For the most part, “Crowd Evolution” is not such a game.

Settings can be adjusted by tapping on the gear icon in the upper left hand corner of the screen. There are other options, such as a “spin wheel” or “challenge levels”, that can be explored, but aren’t necessary. These require the viewing of an ad to attempt.

Since there’s only one main game mode, the main screen also functions as the start of the level. You’ll get offers to upgrade your “year” or “manpower” by either using cash or watching a promo, right from the outset. There might be a pop-up urging you to view one in order to play a “bonus level”. To ignore these and start playing, just tap on the bottom of the screen and your “army” starts moving. 

It’s pretty much as straightforward as it gets.

GRAPHICS

In a word, the graphics are “abysmal”. There is nothing visually pleasing about any facet of it. The “good guys” are just blue blobs that vaguely resemble humans; the bad guys are similarly-shaped red blobs. They also happen to be naked more often than not. It seems the further into the future we go, the more and more clothing becomes optional and/or irrelevant. The backgrounds are basic and suffer from a severe lack of detail. They always look the same no matter how far you progress.

The “costumes” for all of the different time periods are also incredibly lame. For example, year 5000 A.D. - or thereabouts - is the “Hero Age”. This is expressed through people who wear pink tops, have pink mohawks, and shoot pink stars out of their hands. Or guns. Or something. And how is the year 2000 the “ninja age”? I mean, that’s the era we’re in right now, and I don’t see gobs of people throwing Chinese stars. The time periods are utterly laughable. 

Look at these stunning graphics.

I guess the plus side to all this, if there is one, is that this game will probably run smoothly on any Android device made since 2010.

GAME MODES

Beyond the base game, “Crowd Evolution” does offer up some “Challenge Levels”. These cost a set amount of in-game currency to play, and, on average, pay less than double the entry fee if completed. These levels are generally more difficult; the enemy count is increased, and more of them are armed. Of course, the player can view an ad upon completion to further multiply their earnings.

"Challenge levels" are the same as regular levels, only slightly harder.

While the enemy count is increased, the mechanics otherwise stay the same. There are no penalties for avoiding bad guys; in fact, the payout is the same for killing stationary enemies as it is for armed ones. You do get money for each enemy killed, but outside of that, there’s no need to go out of your way to kill the more difficult ones.

There are also “bonus levels”. These seem to offer more cash than normal, but also require viewing an ad just to attempt. Once again, core mechanics are exactly the same on these. 

CONTROLS

The controls are pretty responsive, and represent the pinnacle of what this game has to offer. Then again, they’re also severely limited. Your characters are automatically pushed forward on every level. Firing weapons is also automatic, and controlled by the game. There are no ways to stop or move backwards. The only movements the player can control is sliding the characters left and right, to avoid obstacles and to activate the “effect panels” as I call them.

If you can slide your finger from side to side, you'll have no problems.

They move where you want them to. That’s all there is to say about that.

AUDIO

One thing that probably separates me from other mobile gamers - even casual ones - is tha I typically play games muted. I don’t know why. Part of it is because I tend to play violent games with other family members around, and don’t want them to hear the ensuing carnage. Or sometimes to even know that I’m playing a game at all.

Sometimes, when turning up the audio, I learn that I’ve been missing out on an aspect that makes the game more immersive. I find that the sounds in the game are actually an important part of what makes the game fun, or exciting.

“Crowd Evolution” is not such a game. There is no music at all, even on the main menu. The only sound effects are the constant “swoosh” of weapons being thrown/fired. Hitting an enemy results in a dull “thud”. And that’s about the extent of the sound bank. It seems as if the game was made to be played on “mute”, as the effects add nothing to the experience.

GAMEPLAY

Gameplay is “Crowd Evolution” is as simple as it gets, though somewhat hard to explain. You navigate through short levels by controlling an army of blue “good guys”. The number of characters you start with can be increased by using in-game currency, or by watching ads. Your characters start off as cavemen in the “stone age”, throwing rocks at enemies to dispatch them; their starting “era” can also be upgraded through in-game money and ads.

“Effects panels” are scattered throughout the levels, their effect on the game clearly marked in the panel itself. For example, passing through one marked “+400 Years” will take your characters 400 years into the future. This changes their weaponry accordingly; cavemen throwing stones will then be shooting arrows.

They can also have negative effects. For example, walking through one marked “-3 People” will take 3 players away from your “army”. Walking through one marked “-200 years” will set your group’s time period back accordingly. It’s all pretty obvious how each one will affect your team.

Other “good guys” are also randomly scattered throughout the levels. They can be “saved” by walking over them, at which point they are added to your army. They cannot be killed by either enemy or “friendly” fire, making things rather easy. And if you fail to save one…well, once again, there are no penalties. 

This setup could make for a rather interesting game mechanic. Unfortunately, the execution is laughably bad. For starters, all the “bad effects” are marked in red, while the “good” ones are in green. This makes it easy to pick the “right” choice at a glance. The only “real” decision making comes when two side-by-side effect panels are of the same color. There might be one marked “+300 months” next to one that’s “+300 years”, forcing you to decide on the fly which one is better. Gee, that’s hard.

Further hindering the game is that the upgrades barely seem to matter. The bad guys all take one hit to kill regardless of the weapon being used. This essentially means using guns isn’t any more effective than throwing stones. And that means the game is incredibly easy. I made it through 150 “normal” levels and a couple “challenge” rounds, before I finally died. (I fell through a hole in the map, effectively killing my whole team in one fell swoop.) That says something, because I tend to suck on everything mobile.

Most of the enemies are either stationary, or run toward your characters unarmed. In later levels, a few enemies are armed and fire back. But these enemies are few and far between, and still don’t amount to much of a challenge. Unless you only have two or three characters remaining.

At the end of each level, your army is dwindled down to a single character, who automatically fires at a series of pillars. Each pillar displays the amount of damage required to destroy it, and increases the further you go. There are about twenty pillars in a row. This is one area where stats might make a slight difference; the higher your damage and firing rate, the farther you’re likely to go. But once again, the weapons don’t add much, if anything. So whether you’re an alien firing lasers, or a guy throwing ninja stars, you’re likely to go about the same distance.

The end of the level is as long as the main part.

If you fail to destroy all the pillars, it’s not a big deal: You continue on to the next level, with more chances to upgrade your “stats” through in-game currency or ad watching. If you do destroy them all, you “unlock” a new area on your map, which has no effect on gameplay. The map serves no purpose, outside of functioning as a visual display of your “progress”. The more levels you beat, the bigger and more colorful it becomes. That’s it.

There are no rewards for this. You do not receive extra cash, or receive an ad-free upgrade of any stats. Your only “prize” is to continue on to the next level in exactly the same fashion as if you failed. You’re still inundated with offers to upgrade your army through in-game currency or ads, for the same price as before. 

An upgraded map, which earns you, well...nothing.

The most aggravating part is that this ending section takes about as long - if not longer than - the level itself. With no incentive for its completion, I’ve found the best thing to do is intentionally walk into a pillar as early into this section as possible. This immediately ends the level and moves you on to the next one, saving precious minutes over a short period of time.

ADS/GREED

It shouldn’t come as a shock that a game that’s abundantly advertised in other games would feature abundant advertisements in their own product. “Crowd Evolution” plays more like an ad with a game in it, rather than vice versa.

Bonus levels require an ad view to play.

Completing a level results in a skippable ad; money earned from the level can be multiplied by watching an unskippable advert. In-game upgrades use in-game currency; once that’s used up, players are invited to upgrade for “free” by watching an unskippable 30-second promo. There are “bonus levels” that occasionally pop up; these also require the viewing of a full ad to play.

For $2.99, the player can go “ad-free”, which sounds like an enticing deal. However, that only removes the short, skippable ads at the end of each level. The game still constantly hammers you with requests to watch full ones for “free upgrades”. Clearly, paying for the ad-free version just isn’t worth it, something that makes it feel extra scammy.

Outside of the option to go “ad-free”, I must confess there really aren’t any other “paid” upgrades. Everything else in the game can be acquired by viewing promos. Whether this is a good or a bad thing depends on the person, but I personally find it to be slightly more acceptable than the games that hit you with a dozen pop-ups for $50 guns or bulk “diamond” purchases upon startup. 

Get used to seeing these offers.

Sure, the constant offers are annoying, but at least they’re mostly voluntary. And since the upgrades do very little, they’re not the least bit necessary.

FUN

Quite simply put, “Crowd Evolution” fails to provide much in the way of fun. It’s the type of game you can play once, and quite literally experience all that it has to offer. The levels look redundant, and the gameplay mechanics are the same across the board, no matter what type of “game mode” you’re playing. The “choices” you make are clearly labeled (“green” for “good” outcomes; “red” for bad), eliminating the potential for stressful, on-the-fly decisions.

It’s the same thing, every single time. There is nothing promoting long-term replayability here in the slightest.

IN CONCLUSION

There’s probably the outline of a fun game in here somewhere, but it’s buried deep under the tedious gameplay and heavy ad load. If you’re not being force-fed an ad after every action, you’re being “requested” to watch one for the sake of providing mostly unnecessary upgrades for your group.

Unless you’re the type of person that keeps their cable TV subscription solely for the ads, “Crowd Evolution” has absolutely nothing to offer.

OVERALL: 1/10.

Zombie Hunter Fire (Android)

WHAT IS IT?

Zombie Hunter Fire is yet another single-player offline Android game where you destroy waves of zombies, in between upgrading weapons and acquiring other items.

UI

The UI is…interesting. It’s very ugly, actually. I can’t put my finger on why, but it’s not very inviting to look at. Maybe the size of the lettering? The font? The fact everything else in the game is disgusting so it’s just guilt by association? 

The main menu

Navigating the menus is generally pretty easy. Weapons are displayed on the side of the main menu; tapping on any equipped item will take you to the weapons page to upgrade them or to purchase new ones. “Stage” can be selected to take you to where you left off in the single-player campaign. Alternatively, you can hit the red “Quick Start” button underneath the weapons on the right side of the screen to jump right into the heat of battle.

There are also options to get free gold (by watching ads), a menu for upgrading skills, and a “message center” that occasionally grants free coins and items. All of these are clearly labeled and easy to access. The only misleading one is the “gift” icon, which merely offers three additional games to download from the same studio.

Outside of its general tackiness, navigation is pretty clear and straightforward. That’s not always the case with mobile games, so I guess we will consider this a slight “win”.

GRAPHICS

The graphics just look and feel outdated. Actually, the whole game has the feel of being tossed together over a weekend for some 24-hour game competition. The zombies seem to float in the air rather than walk, and the ragdoll physics are just godawful. Destroyed monsters will contort themselves into impossible positions as they fall into their final death pose. Some even stay standing, making it seem as if they’re still “live” enemies.

The “blood” is cheap and generic, with odd glowing red orbs emanating from each bullet strike. Outside of that, there’s no other evidence of physical damage to attacking creatures.

Look at those convincing blood droplets.

Zombies aren’t the only things looking for some fresh meat; other monster types make frequent appearances, as well. There are fat chainsaw wielding maniacs; axe-wielding zombies - in both male and female variants; and shield-carrying undead whose exposed heads are their only weakness. And…well shit, that’s about it. Seeing the same creatures over and over again quickly wears as thin as everything else. 

The visuals combine to create a feeling of grunginess that rubs off on the player. It’s akin to the way I felt watching horrible old Italian zombie movies like Hell of the Living Dead and Burial Ground. While that might have sounded enticing to me prior to this experience, I can assure you that playing a Z-grade zombie game isn’t nearly as fun as watching one.

AUDIO

Proving the developer’s clear lack of commitment to every facet of the game’s design is the game’s godawful audio. The main menu music is ultra-corny rock music that doesn’t set any sort of appropriate mood. In fact, it feels out of place. I can almost guarantee it was lifted from some library of public domain tracks.

The in-game sounds don’t fare much better. During battle, there is no music at all. This could actually be an immersive decision, as it forces focus on the action. Except that the sound effects also feel incomplete. The gunshots in the game are basic and tinny, probably sound effects from a “free sounds” website. Outside of that, there’s the sound of metal when you hit an airborne ax launched from a zombie; a generic “uh” when your character dies…and that’s about it. 

No, literally, that’s it. The monsters themselves make no sounds whatsoever. It doesn’t matter what they are doing: attacking, moving, getting hit…they are completely silent. Including the chainsaw-wielding psychopaths, who swing their weapons around so quietly, you could hear a pin drop. Pro tip: If you know your game isn’t going to have the proper budget or time to add sound effects, you probably shouldn’t feature creatures carrying the loudest possible weapons. 

CONTROLS

The controls have a familiar setup to other games, with the left side controlling your character’s movements and the right side handling the weapons. The game uses a “stationary” mechanic where your character is apparently paralyzed; the movement pad moves the crosshairs in the direction specified. Movements beyond that are handled by the game. 

The controls are straightforward and marked on the bottom of the screen.

A large “fire” button handles gunfire. Firing the weapon is completely unsatisfactory, and feels too slow. I can’t tell if it’s a control issue, or if the gun just needs to be upgraded in order to perform better. Either way, I don’t even care.

Grenades and other items are centered in the middle of the screen. This is an awkward location that requires moving the hands to reach, lest you have a long thumb. The distance is especially obvious during the “heat” of “battle”.

Overall, the controls are sufficient, I suppose. But not enough to overcome any of the game’s other notable issues.

GAMEPLAY

The base game is like any other zombie hunting game: You play in levels that consist entirely of killing all the monsters that appear on screen. That’s all there is to it. Once you complete a level, you are then tossed into the next one, which looks quite similar to the one before it. 

This is not an issue in and of itself. There are plenty of monotonous games that manage to be fun, at least for a little while. The issue with Zombie Hunter Fire, besides the nonsensical name, is that it has the feel of being thrown together in the dark. 

My new gun, which apparntly deals 14.4 damage per bullet...

Take the weapons system, for example. Newly purchased weapons are often way weaker than older upgraded weapons. Yet the cost to upgrade the “new”, “stronger” weapons is notably more expensive. This becomes more obvious in later levels, when it can take an entire clip to dispatch one zombie with weaker guns. 

...and my old gun, which deals 20 damage and is cheaper to upgrade.

Gold can be used to upgrade “skills”, like headshot damage and overall weapon power. The latter is incredibly expensive, and don’t really seem to have much of an effect. My main gun sucked before I upgraded, and still sucked after the upgrade. “Shields” are ridiculously cheap (1 gold bar) and block up to three strikes per round. These are a great deal and are really helpful; they represent the best value in the “upgrade” department.

The game is “beginner heavy”, which is a lame term I made up for games that are easy in the beginning, but then quickly ramp up difficulty. I’m stuck on level 53 because both of my guns suck, and my “skills” need upgrading. The problem is, upgrading requires playing the game to earn resources. And I have no further desire to play this game. 

Randomly, the game employs an “energy” mechanism, but it doesn’t work the way it does with most games. This is both a welcome change, and also an unnecessary annoyance. Instead of each level costing “energy” to play, it’s only the boss stages and “endless” game modes that require the use of batteries. Alternatively, you can use your available energy to open up supply boxes. Opening one costs 3 batteries, while 5 can be opened for 10. This is a much better “deal”, but the issue is, the contents are always underwhelming.

Wow, look at this great five-crate haul.

Coin amounts in each crate seem to max out at 1,000, but are often much less than that. That means it’s all too common to get fewer than 1000 coins in five crates. Total. The chests can also contain useful items like shields and XP boosts, but don’t feel worth it at all. (Especially since shields only cost 1 gold in the store). 

GAME MODES

To break up the monotony from the single player campaign, Zombie Hunter Fire offers up a couple of other monotonous game modes. The main one is “Survival”. This is a standard in many zombie games. Instead of playing short levels, you square off against endless waves of zombies, seeing how far you can progress before dying. I hate game modes (and games) like this. I don’t like knowing I’m going to die. That’s not something that’s interesting to me. Sure, I die all the time in regular games with an ending, but I like knowing that there’s the possibility of actually ending. Going on and on indefinitely does nothing for me.

Plus, the longer you survive, the longer the game goes. I like games where I can just pick up and put it down whenever. The idea of setting aside time just in case I make it far is another thing that doesn’t appeal to me in the slightest.

Test your tolerance for the game in "survival" mode.

The one plus is some games reward players handsomely for progressing far in this mode. Here, you get your score in coins (I believe it’s 20 coins for every zombie killed), and then have the option to triple that by watching ads. I made it to wave 21, and managed to bag over 16,000 coins for my effort. It can be used to raise funds in a pinch, and is helpful in earlier levels.

The problem is, once weapon upgrades start costing upwards of 48,000, even that amount won’t do much to help. And each “round” costs five “batteries” (representing the aforementioned energy). Since you only get 10, you can play twice before being required to wait 2.5 hours to earn enough to play again.

“Boss” levels are also handled similarly. Each boss takes five “batteries” to fight. Defeating these monsters results in higher cash payouts, but I nevertheless avoid them. Maybe that’s the reason I always find myself short on funds for everything.

ADS/GREED

You're always greeted with one of these first thing.

“Zombie Hunter Fire” is guilty of one of the most annoying practices in mobile games: Pop-up ads. And I’m not talking about third-party ads: I’m talking about the ones that offer upgrades requiring real cash. Right off the bat, every single time the application is loaded. Clicking out of them is easy enough, requiring a tap of the standard “X” in the top right corner, but it’s the principle. It’s the mobile equivalent of panhandling on a street corner. 

Outside of that, the ad load is actually pretty standard. Completing levels results in the forced viewing of a skippable ad. Users can watch videos for additional gold bars. Past levels can be replayed to earn extra in-game currency (though at a reduced rate), which can further prevent the need to spend money for upgrades. Hell, there isn’t even a way to replenish energy “batteries” quicker, whether by watching ads or paying real money. 

The game might feel “scummy”, but at least it doesn’t feel scammy; at least, no moreso than similar games.

FUN

Here’s one of the few areas that truly matter; the one area where many downfalls can be redeemed. I’m sure we’ve all experienced those games that we have a strong affinity for, despite there being one glaring, or several minor flaws. That guilty pleasure we all turn back to, even though we know we shouldn’t. 

Get used to seeing these words.

This is not that game. Nowhere close. It’s a steaming pile of shit. It feels like a college student’s first attempt at coding their own game. Actually, if this were the case, it would be impressive. But as an “official” full release, it’s nothing short of embarrassing.

There’s nothing entertaining about it. The levels and enemies are ultra-repetitive. The weapons are often weak and underpowered. Maybe I played the game “wrong” and wasted gold on the wrong things. But that’s the thing: Even if I was easily blasting through every level, the game would suck. I made it to level 52, and the most exciting thing about the experience is the knowledge that, soon, I can delete it from my phone.

IN CONCLUSION

Zombie games seem to be pretty popular these days, and there are certainly many good ones. Zombie Hunter Fire is one of those copies that seem to be thrown together just to “cash in” on the popularity of such games. There is no imagination or inspiration behind it, besides earning money. But it even misses opportunities on that front. There’s no way to pay for extra “energy”, which is required for “boss” and “survival” modes. It’s so half-assed that it can’t even accurately succeed as a cash grab.

I really try avoiding this score. I really do. The cynic in me doesn’t mind giving them, but I want the ratings to at least have some sort of personal consistency. And if I’m giving zeroes left and right, that makes me seem like some person who can’t be impressed. Like some royalty scoffing at the peasants. That’s definitely not me. (Well, not usually, anyway).

Images can't convey how terrible this game truly is.

The issue is that I’m struggling to find something that I like; some aspect of the game I don’t entirely despise. And I’m coming up with nothing. Just the very thought of playing the game makes me cringe; that probably tells me everything I need to know. 

There are so many things wrong with the end result that you’d swear the point was to get people to avoid playing it. It’s hard to imagine making something this bad without intending to make something this bad. 

I got more satisfaction out of deleting it from my device than actually playing the game could ever provide.

OVERALL: 0/10.