Zombie Hunter Fire (Android)

WHAT IS IT?

Zombie Hunter Fire is yet another single-player offline Android game where you destroy waves of zombies, in between upgrading weapons and acquiring other items.

UI

The UI is…interesting. It’s very ugly, actually. I can’t put my finger on why, but it’s not very inviting to look at. Maybe the size of the lettering? The font? The fact everything else in the game is disgusting so it’s just guilt by association? 

The main menu

Navigating the menus is generally pretty easy. Weapons are displayed on the side of the main menu; tapping on any equipped item will take you to the weapons page to upgrade them or to purchase new ones. “Stage” can be selected to take you to where you left off in the single-player campaign. Alternatively, you can hit the red “Quick Start” button underneath the weapons on the right side of the screen to jump right into the heat of battle.

There are also options to get free gold (by watching ads), a menu for upgrading skills, and a “message center” that occasionally grants free coins and items. All of these are clearly labeled and easy to access. The only misleading one is the “gift” icon, which merely offers three additional games to download from the same studio.

Outside of its general tackiness, navigation is pretty clear and straightforward. That’s not always the case with mobile games, so I guess we will consider this a slight “win”.

GRAPHICS

The graphics just look and feel outdated. Actually, the whole game has the feel of being tossed together over a weekend for some 24-hour game competition. The zombies seem to float in the air rather than walk, and the ragdoll physics are just godawful. Destroyed monsters will contort themselves into impossible positions as they fall into their final death pose. Some even stay standing, making it seem as if they’re still “live” enemies.

The “blood” is cheap and generic, with odd glowing red orbs emanating from each bullet strike. Outside of that, there’s no other evidence of physical damage to attacking creatures.

Look at those convincing blood droplets.

Zombies aren’t the only things looking for some fresh meat; other monster types make frequent appearances, as well. There are fat chainsaw wielding maniacs; axe-wielding zombies - in both male and female variants; and shield-carrying undead whose exposed heads are their only weakness. And…well shit, that’s about it. Seeing the same creatures over and over again quickly wears as thin as everything else. 

The visuals combine to create a feeling of grunginess that rubs off on the player. It’s akin to the way I felt watching horrible old Italian zombie movies like Hell of the Living Dead and Burial Ground. While that might have sounded enticing to me prior to this experience, I can assure you that playing a Z-grade zombie game isn’t nearly as fun as watching one.

AUDIO

Proving the developer’s clear lack of commitment to every facet of the game’s design is the game’s godawful audio. The main menu music is ultra-corny rock music that doesn’t set any sort of appropriate mood. In fact, it feels out of place. I can almost guarantee it was lifted from some library of public domain tracks.

The in-game sounds don’t fare much better. During battle, there is no music at all. This could actually be an immersive decision, as it forces focus on the action. Except that the sound effects also feel incomplete. The gunshots in the game are basic and tinny, probably sound effects from a “free sounds” website. Outside of that, there’s the sound of metal when you hit an airborne ax launched from a zombie; a generic “uh” when your character dies…and that’s about it. 

No, literally, that’s it. The monsters themselves make no sounds whatsoever. It doesn’t matter what they are doing: attacking, moving, getting hit…they are completely silent. Including the chainsaw-wielding psychopaths, who swing their weapons around so quietly, you could hear a pin drop. Pro tip: If you know your game isn’t going to have the proper budget or time to add sound effects, you probably shouldn’t feature creatures carrying the loudest possible weapons. 

CONTROLS

The controls have a familiar setup to other games, with the left side controlling your character’s movements and the right side handling the weapons. The game uses a “stationary” mechanic where your character is apparently paralyzed; the movement pad moves the crosshairs in the direction specified. Movements beyond that are handled by the game. 

The controls are straightforward and marked on the bottom of the screen.

A large “fire” button handles gunfire. Firing the weapon is completely unsatisfactory, and feels too slow. I can’t tell if it’s a control issue, or if the gun just needs to be upgraded in order to perform better. Either way, I don’t even care.

Grenades and other items are centered in the middle of the screen. This is an awkward location that requires moving the hands to reach, lest you have a long thumb. The distance is especially obvious during the “heat” of “battle”.

Overall, the controls are sufficient, I suppose. But not enough to overcome any of the game’s other notable issues.

GAMEPLAY

The base game is like any other zombie hunting game: You play in levels that consist entirely of killing all the monsters that appear on screen. That’s all there is to it. Once you complete a level, you are then tossed into the next one, which looks quite similar to the one before it. 

This is not an issue in and of itself. There are plenty of monotonous games that manage to be fun, at least for a little while. The issue with Zombie Hunter Fire, besides the nonsensical name, is that it has the feel of being thrown together in the dark. 

My new gun, which apparntly deals 14.4 damage per bullet...

Take the weapons system, for example. Newly purchased weapons are often way weaker than older upgraded weapons. Yet the cost to upgrade the “new”, “stronger” weapons is notably more expensive. This becomes more obvious in later levels, when it can take an entire clip to dispatch one zombie with weaker guns. 

...and my old gun, which deals 20 damage and is cheaper to upgrade.

Gold can be used to upgrade “skills”, like headshot damage and overall weapon power. The latter is incredibly expensive, and don’t really seem to have much of an effect. My main gun sucked before I upgraded, and still sucked after the upgrade. “Shields” are ridiculously cheap (1 gold bar) and block up to three strikes per round. These are a great deal and are really helpful; they represent the best value in the “upgrade” department.

The game is “beginner heavy”, which is a lame term I made up for games that are easy in the beginning, but then quickly ramp up difficulty. I’m stuck on level 53 because both of my guns suck, and my “skills” need upgrading. The problem is, upgrading requires playing the game to earn resources. And I have no further desire to play this game. 

Randomly, the game employs an “energy” mechanism, but it doesn’t work the way it does with most games. This is both a welcome change, and also an unnecessary annoyance. Instead of each level costing “energy” to play, it’s only the boss stages and “endless” game modes that require the use of batteries. Alternatively, you can use your available energy to open up supply boxes. Opening one costs 3 batteries, while 5 can be opened for 10. This is a much better “deal”, but the issue is, the contents are always underwhelming.

Wow, look at this great five-crate haul.

Coin amounts in each crate seem to max out at 1,000, but are often much less than that. That means it’s all too common to get fewer than 1000 coins in five crates. Total. The chests can also contain useful items like shields and XP boosts, but don’t feel worth it at all. (Especially since shields only cost 1 gold in the store). 

GAME MODES

To break up the monotony from the single player campaign, Zombie Hunter Fire offers up a couple of other monotonous game modes. The main one is “Survival”. This is a standard in many zombie games. Instead of playing short levels, you square off against endless waves of zombies, seeing how far you can progress before dying. I hate game modes (and games) like this. I don’t like knowing I’m going to die. That’s not something that’s interesting to me. Sure, I die all the time in regular games with an ending, but I like knowing that there’s the possibility of actually ending. Going on and on indefinitely does nothing for me.

Plus, the longer you survive, the longer the game goes. I like games where I can just pick up and put it down whenever. The idea of setting aside time just in case I make it far is another thing that doesn’t appeal to me in the slightest.

Test your tolerance for the game in "survival" mode.

The one plus is some games reward players handsomely for progressing far in this mode. Here, you get your score in coins (I believe it’s 20 coins for every zombie killed), and then have the option to triple that by watching ads. I made it to wave 21, and managed to bag over 16,000 coins for my effort. It can be used to raise funds in a pinch, and is helpful in earlier levels.

The problem is, once weapon upgrades start costing upwards of 48,000, even that amount won’t do much to help. And each “round” costs five “batteries” (representing the aforementioned energy). Since you only get 10, you can play twice before being required to wait 2.5 hours to earn enough to play again.

“Boss” levels are also handled similarly. Each boss takes five “batteries” to fight. Defeating these monsters results in higher cash payouts, but I nevertheless avoid them. Maybe that’s the reason I always find myself short on funds for everything.

ADS/GREED

You're always greeted with one of these first thing.

“Zombie Hunter Fire” is guilty of one of the most annoying practices in mobile games: Pop-up ads. And I’m not talking about third-party ads: I’m talking about the ones that offer upgrades requiring real cash. Right off the bat, every single time the application is loaded. Clicking out of them is easy enough, requiring a tap of the standard “X” in the top right corner, but it’s the principle. It’s the mobile equivalent of panhandling on a street corner. 

Outside of that, the ad load is actually pretty standard. Completing levels results in the forced viewing of a skippable ad. Users can watch videos for additional gold bars. Past levels can be replayed to earn extra in-game currency (though at a reduced rate), which can further prevent the need to spend money for upgrades. Hell, there isn’t even a way to replenish energy “batteries” quicker, whether by watching ads or paying real money. 

The game might feel “scummy”, but at least it doesn’t feel scammy; at least, no moreso than similar games.

FUN

Here’s one of the few areas that truly matter; the one area where many downfalls can be redeemed. I’m sure we’ve all experienced those games that we have a strong affinity for, despite there being one glaring, or several minor flaws. That guilty pleasure we all turn back to, even though we know we shouldn’t. 

Get used to seeing these words.

This is not that game. Nowhere close. It’s a steaming pile of shit. It feels like a college student’s first attempt at coding their own game. Actually, if this were the case, it would be impressive. But as an “official” full release, it’s nothing short of embarrassing.

There’s nothing entertaining about it. The levels and enemies are ultra-repetitive. The weapons are often weak and underpowered. Maybe I played the game “wrong” and wasted gold on the wrong things. But that’s the thing: Even if I was easily blasting through every level, the game would suck. I made it to level 52, and the most exciting thing about the experience is the knowledge that, soon, I can delete it from my phone.

IN CONCLUSION

Zombie games seem to be pretty popular these days, and there are certainly many good ones. Zombie Hunter Fire is one of those copies that seem to be thrown together just to “cash in” on the popularity of such games. There is no imagination or inspiration behind it, besides earning money. But it even misses opportunities on that front. There’s no way to pay for extra “energy”, which is required for “boss” and “survival” modes. It’s so half-assed that it can’t even accurately succeed as a cash grab.

I really try avoiding this score. I really do. The cynic in me doesn’t mind giving them, but I want the ratings to at least have some sort of personal consistency. And if I’m giving zeroes left and right, that makes me seem like some person who can’t be impressed. Like some royalty scoffing at the peasants. That’s definitely not me. (Well, not usually, anyway).

Images can't convey how terrible this game truly is.

The issue is that I’m struggling to find something that I like; some aspect of the game I don’t entirely despise. And I’m coming up with nothing. Just the very thought of playing the game makes me cringe; that probably tells me everything I need to know. 

There are so many things wrong with the end result that you’d swear the point was to get people to avoid playing it. It’s hard to imagine making something this bad without intending to make something this bad. 

I got more satisfaction out of deleting it from my device than actually playing the game could ever provide.

OVERALL: 0/10.

Soccer Super Star (Android)

WHAT IS IT?

In “Soccer Star” you assume the role of a soccer player attempting to climb the professional soccer ranks by completing "games" broken down into individual "plays".

GAMEPLAY

In “Soccer Star” you assume the role of a soccer player attempting to climb the professional soccer ranks. Each “game” is broken down into 1-3 “scenarios”, which are essentially scoring chances. Once a player has control of the ball, the game “pauses”, allowing you to see your players and the defensive setup. You slide your finger to dictate where you want the ball to go, and play resumes. If one of your players gets it, they dribble until they’re in position, and the game pauses again, letting you set up the next pass. This continues until you either score a goal, or the opposing team gains control of the ball.

There are no “move” limits, so you can take your time setting up the perfect play. The only limit imposed are the “passing lines” visible during each move. Your pass must be within those lines in order for it to be “accepted”. If you attempt a pass outside of these lines, the lines flash to remind you of the rules, and you’re required to make another move that falls within the lines. That means you can’t just fire the ball to any open player, and gives the game an almost puzzle-like feel.

The ball's path must stay within the yellow lines.

In order to complete a “match”, the player must score a goal in all of the game’s scenarios, without the opposing team gaining control of the ball. The number of plays vary from game to game: There can be as few as one, or as many as three. If the player fails at any point during the match, they must either watch an ad to continue where they left off, or start over from the beginning. 

You’re also given a star rating at the end of every match. The way(s) that you earn them can vary from game to game. Sometimes, you just have to complete the match to earn all three. Other times, certain players or spots on the field (or in the goal) will have a star. In order to earn it, the ball must travel through the starred area (or to the starred player). In the case of players, they don’t have to be the ones to score; they simply have to make contact with the ball at some point.

And that’s pretty much the entire game, in a nutshell.

There are a few little annoyances that gradually add up to more over time. For example, the difficulty seems to randomly ramp up for certain levels, before dipping back down again. This would make sense for “championships”, or other high-pressure matches, but there doesn’t seem to be a rhyme or reason on when this happens.

Most games the opposing team’s goalie will struggle to make all but the simplest of saves. I mean, there were times where even I was upset the moron couldn’t keep it out of the net, and I was the one trying to score. But then, out of nowhere, he’ll piece together a string of three (or sometimes more) back-to-back saves that defy all logic. Ditto that for the opposition’s defense. For the most part, they just stand back and let you develop your play, acting more like obstacles than actual AI. Sure, they challenge the ball once in a while, but not aggressively. 

Then, out of the blue, they’ll attack the ball. They’ll take it from players in mid-dribble. They won’t give your team any breathing room whatsoever. Passes that work almost 100% of the time are broken up with relative ease. Your players will lose the ball without the appearance of even trying not to lose the ball.

Then the next level hits and the opposing team is back to their usual “chill” selves. I wouldn’t say the default difficulty is “too easy”, but it’s definitely closer to that than hard. 

There are also an abundance of questionable AI decisions, both on the part of your own team, and the game itself. For example, you’ll feed the ball to a player who’s all alone. He’s onsides, and ahead of the defense, in prime scoring position with no one else anywhere close. Suddenly, he’ll just stop a mile away from the goal, forcing you to either fire a low-percentage shot on goal, or to make an additional blind pass to a teammate who may or may not be there. You can swivel the camera around to look, but your field of vision barely extends beyond the “passing lines”. In these situations, there are often to visible options, frequently ending in failure.

A random gameplay image that sums everything up.

In other plays, you’ll pass the ball to a player with a solid angle who looks like they’ll wiggle free for a clear shot (or pass). But then they’ll inexplicably double back and turn around, forcing you to play the ball to someone further back, out of scoring position.

The last issue is the complete inconsistency of when a play is considered dead. Sometimes, it ends when the opposing team simply touches the ball. Other times, it ends after an opposing player dribbles it a few times, giving your team a chance to steal it back. Yet, in other situations, the opposition will clear the ball deep into your own defensive zone, yet the play is inexplicably still live, giving you an opportunity to move the ball all the way down the field in order to score.

Any of the above situations would feel more valid if there were clear guidelines established beforehand. But it gets frustrating when you expect the play to keep going, and it’s just suddenly ruled as a failure. Especially when it’s in the third and final “scenario”, resulting in having to either watch an ad to continue where you left off, or to replay all of them in order to advance.

On the positive front, I do like how the situations never feel entirely “scripted”. Passing the ball to the same player in the same situation often yields different results. For example, you might pass to a guy who then loses control of the ball and hands it over to the opponent, causing you to fail. Then, on your next try, you might pass the ball to the same guy, and he manages to shake the defender, resulting in a clear scoring (or passing) chance. 

While it can be somewhat irritating in practice (if he wiggled free this time, why didn’t he just do that last time) it also speaks to the unpredictable nature of sports. If you were to take any famous highlight from any sport, and attempt to recreate it multiple times - with the exact same players in the exact same position on the field - the outcome would likely be different every time. A successful “Hail Mary” in American football, for example, would end in an incomplete pass more often than not. Each play depends on several variables that all have to fall in place to deliver a successful outcome.

That makes the AI in “Soccer Star” feel “adaptable” and somewhat true-to-life. Sure, sometimes it comes down to junk AI (it is a scripted game, after all), but when it leads to a highlight-reel goal, it also makes it feel like your decisions matter. And that can lead to a sense of accomplishment, no matter how small. Or brief.

GAME MODES

Speaking to its complete lack of variety, “Soccer Star” offers nothing outside of the main game mode. There are no events, no “PvP” option, no “practice” mode…nothing to break up the monotony of the base game.

In other words, if you find yourself unimpressed with the first few levels, then nothing following those are going to win you over.

UI

The UI is as simple as it gets.

While the game may quickly wear out its welcome, the simple design does wonders for its user interface. Navigating through the game is as simple as it gets. The main screen shows you where you left off in your current season. Continuing requires only a single tap of the screen. You can also scroll to results for previous seasons, and return to the current match with the tap of a single button.

You can "upgrade" your character's appearance, but that's about it.

If you want to change your character’s appearance, simply tap on your character’s avatar at the top left of the screen. Here, you will see all the unlocked options. You can add features like facial hair, change your hairstyle, or even get a new pair of shoes. The further you progress, the more upgrades become available. Unfortunately, none of them boost your character's stats; they're purely cosmetic.

AUDIO

The audio in “Soccer Star” is rather sparse, which also matches the content level. Even with outstanding sound effects, it’s not like the game would be any more varied or immersive.

There’s some lame menu music, and a couple sound effects when you tap on menu buttons. In-game audio consists pretty much entirely of crowd sounds, including inaudible chants and cheers when a goal is scored; and the ball striking a player’s feet or head (which sound pretty much the same in either case). Occasionally, an otherwise absent announcer screams “gooooooal!” And that’s really about it. These help to boost the atmosphere slightly, but not really enough that the sound demands to be on. 

I play it muted every time and don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything.

CONTROLS

The controls in “Soccer Star” are pretty limited: Slide your finger where you want the ball to go. It’s as simple as that. A whitish line follows your finger on the screen, giving you a visual cue as to the path you’ve chosen. If the path is outside of the “passing lines” - marked as two dotted lines that represent the area in which the pass has to go - then the lines will flash and you’ll have to try again.

For the most part, the ball does follow the path of your finger pretty well. You can even curve the ball (within reason), which is a nice workaround for passes (or shots) you want to make outside of the clear passing lines. Obviously, the end result isn’t always what you want (other players may intercept your pass, for example) but I can’t think of an instance where the ball didn’t go where I “told” it to go.

GRAPHICS/PERFORMANCE

Graphics are adequate for a mobile game. The models are 3-D and look somewhere in the realm of “PlayStation 2”-era graphics. In other words, they won’t wow anyone, but they’re sufficient enough that they also won’t serve as a distraction.

The graphics are acceptable, but nothing noteworthy.

The game runs smoothly on my Pixel 7 Pro with no lag or other issues during gameplay. The only exception seems to be at the end of longer gaming sessions. Then, the game suddenly has issues loading certain textures.  I went through a few levels with large chunks of the “field” missing, leaving only empty white spots in its place. It reminded me a lot of playing old NES cartridges, which are notoriously prone to such visual glitches.

Continuing would eventually lead to the game completely freezing. This issue happened multiple times, but generally occurred after the twenty-minute mark. “Fixing” it was as simple as closing out and restarting it. It also served as a helpful reminder that I’d been playing the game for too long, anyway. 

I never had any such issues during shorter sessions.

ADS/GREED

The ad load is pretty much standard: Completing full levels requires the viewing of a (skippable) ad. If you fail a scenario, sometimes you get the option to repeat it for free. Other times it requires the viewing of a 30-second, non-skippable ad. There are random occasional ads here and there after performing a non-game function, such as entering and exiting a menu. While it’s annoying, these ads are also skippable. 

Failure usually requires viewing an ad to retry, but is sometimes generous.

Since there are no character upgrades, there aren’t even voluntary free ads to “level up” quicker. In fact, the only voluntary ads are to unlock additional jersey numbers whenever you switch teams. There are nine total numbers available, and you get three for free. Watching an ad unveils three more, which you can do up to two times to reveal all nine. Keep in mind, however, that all the numbers are randomized, so even unlocking them all might not reveal a number you want. It’s a rather curious, odd system.

But the game’s most impressive aspect: There are no in-game purchases. None. I have to say that this is somewhat refreshing, as most games tend to shove in-game purchases down the user’s throat; “Soccer Star” never once asks for real cash. I guess that makes the ad load even more bearable, as the developers need some way to pay the bills.

FUN

I have to admit that I’m not a soccer fan in the least. I find the game to be rather dull overall (why can’t they just shorten the damn field). Yet while I wouldn’t consider myself a fan, I do respect the sport. It has a huge worldwide following, which has to count for something. And as little as I care, I find myself getting sucked into following the World Cup when it comes around every four years. Not enough to actually watch the games, but I do view highlights of every match.

All that being said, no matter how much you love the game, “Soccer Star” simply doesn’t have enough to deliver long-term entertainment. I cleared exactly 400 levels, mainly because I wanted to see if there was a way to "finish" the game. I mean, after so long, even the best players have to retire, right?

I played this game for far too long.

Unfortunately, I grew bored of it before I discovered the answer to that question. Actually, to be clear, I grew bored of it long before season 22, but continued out of sheer determination to see how many goals I could score. What can I say? I’m competitive (and obsessed with stats). And for the record, it seems there is no end. Playing 22 seasons would put my character at 40 years old (assuming he's 18 in his first season). He still looks exactly the same 20 years in as he did at the start. So realism doesn't seem to be a focus.

There just isn’t enough variety to warrant any kind of lasting “fun”. Every level follows the exact same mechanics of the previous one. There aren’t any additional game modes to change things up or to make things interesting.

Hell, there aren't even any incentives for collecting "stars", or even for your character's performance. In fact, the main character serves to purpose at all, except to move the loose "narrative" forward. There aren't MVP awards, or all-star games, or any other reasons to strive for excellence. The game progresses on to the next match no matter which player on your team scores goals. That means whether your character has 0 goals, or 30 at the end of a season, nothing changes.

At the end of each season, you can choose to stay with your current team, or to join another in a different league. Your choice has no bearing on anything. The AI is the same. There is no increase (or decrease) in difficulty no matter where you play. The only difference is the color of your uniforms and the teams you play.

It would be nice if there was some reason, no matter how small, for your character to play an actual role in the game. Like the inclusion of "contracts", or something of the sort, where you're signed with a team of your choice in the beginning. Maybe certain, basic "goals" can be included as "clauses" in the contract - i.e. score 20 goals in a season - that serve as metrics as to how "well" you're doing. If you don't meet those terms, then you can be traded. If you hit the milestones, then you can earn extra cash - which would be tracked to give you an overall idea of your performance - in the form of bonuses. At the end of the season, your team could offer you an extension to stay (with a salary raise, of course) if you met their criteria. Or choose to trade you for the "next big thing".

Or maybe a "fan" gauge where you start off with a modest fan base, and the count gradually increases for every goal you score.

These are just a couple ideas that could help promote replayability. Neither of them alone (or even both together) would "fix" the game's shortcomings. It would still wear thin pretty quickly. But they would certainly help to push it in the right direction.

IN CONCLUSION

If soccer is your thing, you might get a little more mileage out of it…but I highly doubt it. “Soccer Star” is a game that offers some marginal excitement by allowing players to craft some highlight reel soccer goals. But a lack of game modes or anything more in-depth prevents it from being anything more than a quick time-waster. Character customization is incredibly limited, and there are no ways to “level up” or to boost their performance. On the plus side, there are no in-game purchases, which is definitely a breath of fresh air in this era dominated by “pay to win” games. Unfortunately, it’s not enough to overcome the game’s complete lack of substance.

OVERALL: 3.5/10.

Helicopter Escape (Android)

 WHAT IS IT?

“Helicopter Escape” is an action game in which you’re stationed in a helicopter (hence the name). However, you are not the one attempting to do the escaping: Most levels consist of protecting a running human by blasting the hordes of creatures attempting to attack them. Other levels find you circling a building, taking out a tower full of baddies level by level. 

UI

I'm consistently shocked at just how in-depth many mobile games are. There are often menus and submenus, separate "event" menus and side menus, "free upgrade" menus...sometimes it's easy to get lost in all the various options.

Somewhat refreshingly, "Helicopter Escape" is devoid of these confusing navigational issues. Playing the game is straightforward, requiring just a single click upon startup to continue where you left off. Seeing your helicopter skins, avatar, and weapons are also easily navigatable from the main screen. Ditto that for the additional "events", which are prominently displayed from the game's initial menu and reachable with a single tap of the display.

Unfortunately, the game's simple user interface comes at the expense of a complete lack of variety.

GAMEPLAY

There are two types of levels in "Helicopter Escape", and only two types of levels. The typical one involves attemping to save damsels in distress by shooting at creatures attempting to kill the running woman (or "women") from the safety of your own helicopter. The level is completed when the female makes her escape by jumping onto the helicopter's landing gear, allowing it to fly away to safety. Failure occurs when one of the monsters manages to make contact with the innocent character.

While the game runs semi-fast and frantic, it does "slow down" into a near bullet-time mode when a bad guy gets close to the would-be victim. In these moments, exclamation points appear above the closest creature, giving the player extra time to aim and fire. This is a welcome addition, although one that makes an already easy game even easier.

The "skyscraper" levels are fun...at first.

Interspersed with the "escape" levels are the "skyscraper" levels. In these, the player is still stationed in a helicopter, but the person they are trying to save is themself. The 'copter circles around the perimeter of the building, slowly revealing bad guys in each room. "Bullet time" is then activated, giving the player time to pick off the unsuspecting baddies before they are noticed. If the evil henchmen notice the player, exclamation points appear above their head. This means they are about to fire back. But the slowness of the action - along with the fast response time of the controls - means these levels are still far too easy.

These levels are initially the most fun, but like everything else in the game, quickly degrades into mind-melting monotony after about the tenth time.

GAME MODES

Like many action games, “Helicopter Escape” offers up a few different “events” and “game modes”. But unlike many games, none of them stray from the core gameplay. Not even a little bit.

For example, at the time of this writing there is a “robot” event going on. But that just means instead of shooting aliens or zombies, you’ll be shooting robots. It’s still the same side-scrolling levels with the same exact mechanics as any other level. A previous event was based on the “Matrix” games, featuring the player blasting loads of agents, while the defenseless running characters were “good guys” from the movie franchise.

Robot "event".

In other words, while there are “technically” other game modes, none are actually different game modes. It’s just the same ol’ thing presented in a slightly more unique way.

GRAPHICS

The graphics are cutesy.

The graphics are “light” and “playful” given the subject matter. While there’s the constant threat from waves of menacing monsters, it’s never scary; the action aspects are the focal point over everything else. The guns are also cartoony and over-the-top; some might be based in reality, but they’re generally given “flame” skins or other cosmetics additions that make them less “threatening” than real firearms.

It should be noted that the game does contain blood, by default. This can be turned off in settings. Like the rest of the game, it’s not flagrant or too excessive: a brief “splatter” shoots out once a baddie is struck and quickly dissipates. It should also be noted the blood is only red when facing human enemies. Shooting zombies results in green splashes while robots spew out black “oil”. It’s nothing that would be uncomfortable for most teens, though it would likely be too much for younger kids.

There's blood, but it's not excessive.

AUDIO

Much like the game, the audio is thin and monotonous. The music sounds like it was taken from the public domain and adds nothing to the experience. The gun sounds are tinny and unrealistic. I guess both are kind of in line with the cartoonish graphics, but they certainly don’t create any sort of fun - or lasting - atmosphere.

The explosions sound like basic explosions, and each fallen creature elicits a generic “uh” or “oh” upon getting hit. Since there’s no “story”, there’s no spoken dialogue, either. This is one of many mobile games that you can play with the sound off and miss nothing. This can be a good thing when playing in public, but a not-so-great thing when you’re looking for a more immersive experience.

AD LOAD/ GREED LEVEL

The ad levels are a little overabundant. There are skippable ads (after around 5 seconds) following each round, which run around a minute in length. Free upgrades and bonuses require the viewing of a non-skippable thirty second ad. This is pretty standard for a free mobile game.

It's nice to be greeted by an ad first thing.

In addition to that, there are pop-ups for upgrades that require real cash immediately upon "booting" the game. It's presented in the "sale" format seen above. This is the equivalent of a "high-pressure" sales pitch, as it makes people think they might miss out if they don't purchase it right away. I can tell you from experience that no upgrades are even remotely necessary.

I made it to level 230 (no judging, please) without even feeling the need to spend a dime. Many of the "improvements" (outfit, helicopter) are purely cosmetic. Hell, given the near pointlessness of weapon upgrades, one could argue that even the gun upgrades are purely visual. The higher the weapon level, the more bullets shoot out at once, which sounds like it makes them more powerful. But since most enemies take just one hit to kill, and there's no "cooldown" period between shots, they don't offer any extra noticeable damage.

Ads are apparently stapled to the bottom at all times.

Arguably the most egregious example of the game's ad load can be found plastered at the bottom of the in-game screen. There's an omnipresent "banner" that runs the entirety of every level. I have to admit that I never even noticed it until I took screenshots. I also must admit that not once did I ever accidentally tap on one during gameplay. After all, the action takes place well above that area. So while it's far enough out of the way that it's not much of a distraction, it's still an added tactic I don't think I've ever seen in another mobile game. One that I would go so far as to label "excessive."

So the ad tolerance will mostly depend on how obsessed the player is with acquiring upgraded cash and skins. At first, I watched a few videos to get extra money so I could upgrade my guns quicker. Until I eventually realized none of it mattered. After that, I was able to cruise through levels with minimal ad intrusion. And while some gamers who strive to have the “best of the best” might feel compelled to spend some cash, it’s nowhere near necessary to progress.

There are some pretty expensive, completely unnecessary upgrade options.

CONTROLS

The controls are very responsive. Firing the gun consists of tapping the screen where you want the bullets to go. Since you’ll be firing loads of bullets at large waves of baddies, you’ll be furiously tapping the screen. And the bullets go exactly where you tap, as many times as you tap it.

This actually leads me to the conclusion that the controls are almost too responsive. No matter which weapon you’re using, the bullets always go exactly where you want them to. That might sound like a good thing, but it’s one of many things that make upgrading guns pretty well pointless. You would think lower level weaponry would be less accurate at first, and then get more and more accurate with each upgrade. But that’s not the case here. 

At any rate, I’d still give the controls pretty high marks, as there’s no lag in between tapping and waiting for your gun to fire. It’s actually kind of impressive; probably the most stand-out aspect of the entire game.

FUN

Here’s one area where the score takes a hit; it’s just not that fun. Actually, let me rephrase that: It’s fun for a very short while. Until you realize that every level - and event - is more or less the same and that nothing really matters. While some may enjoy “upgrading” their helicopter skins, there’s ultimately no point to it. Even the more expensive helicopter upgrades are just that: skins. They don’t provide any stat upgrades or other useful powerups.

Any single screenshot can more or less sum up the entire game.

Same with the guns, something I feel I’ve already harped on at length. Just out of curiosity, I went and played level 220 with a “weaker” gun; the first one I acquired beyond the initial “default” gun. I still beat the level with no problems. If that doesn’t prove the pointlessness of enhancing weaponry, I don’t know what else possibly could.

I kept playing the game as long as I did out of sheer boredom: I was sick and wanted a way to pass some time. It definitely did that, but by the end I was often more bored than I was before I started. What does that equal…negative fun? I won’t go that far, but let’s just say there’s very little in the way of replayability. And that is, without question, its biggest downfall.

IN CONCLUSION

The graphics are cartoony and somewhat appealing, and the game is fun…for about ten minutes. Then, the reality of limited game modes and ultra-repetitive gameplay sets in, along with pointless upgrades that don’t add any excitement whatsoever. If you’re just looking for a way to kill time over a short period of time - a doctor’s waiting office, for example - this could give you what you’re looking for. Anything beyond that, and there’s not enough here to create any sort of lasting interest.

OVERALL: 2.5/10.